I was planning to keep the hiatus up till the end of ‘mania’. But in this relaxed state I’m in and the fact that just a lot has happened, I need to write.
Mood ring describes me as: Purple meaning: This is a sense of purpose and genuine clarity. This person knows what she wants and is willing go to for it.
Which is probably relating to the fact my only purpose it to finish my homework and revise history.
Where to start?
So I’ve been thinking more about what the psychiatrist said. I can only conceed to borderline Personality disorder if there was another mental illness diagnosed with it because I haven’t got the key diagnostic symptoms of BPD.
Last night I talked a friend out of suicide. It was diffucult give my current manic state to not be completely self absorbed.
I’m off school today because my dad crashed the car. He’s fine. He just hurt his shoulder and his hand. He was wearing a seatbelt. It’s funny, because I was going to go with him because it is SKs birthday today and I hadn’t got her a present but we decided beforehand what to get and my dad said to stay in due to it’s cold and I still have a bad back. Before I go any further into it, I’d like to describe the accident. He was near the shop he was meant to go to and the road is poorly set out. There are two things you have to go round, not roundabouts. But they’re to slow traffic because there’s a doctors, a school and a church nearby. But they have posts on them, black ones. With no reflectors. Also as part of a scheme to save money different areas have street lights off and when my dad was about to take off this guy ran out in front and my dad watched him and because of the lack of visability of these posts and the fact he got distracted, he crashed the car. This was the old car. The one my sister bought is currently in for repairs. So that’s why we didn’t go to school. I wanted to go, I do. Being manic or even hypomanic and being stuck at home is the best and worst thing. Worse thing for me, best for people who want to learn. Plus, I am very far behind in history and I need to get an A on my exam and I’m not at this rate.
I usually on that road don’t wear my seatbelt because we’re about to stop and it I was with him, I would have gone forward and hit my head on the dashboard and would have to go to hospital. So maybe some things work out for the best.
My brother has a virus so he’s all ill. I have no sympathy when manic and its just completlyself centred. But since I am only hypomanic, I am slightly self centred. As for full mania, I don’t think I have experienced like I usually do. Just high periods of hypomania but it gave me the perfect mood to work in. But I haven’t done much. I have some RE homework to do, update my journal etc etc. Just a lot of boring stuff that I have the energy for. But obviously I’d love to be doing something more created.
I am about to go down I think, which sucks a bit because I love hypomania but maybe because it’s only been hypomania, I will experience it longer. But who knows… it’s predictability in unpredicitibility. I have just made an awesome new phrase today.
How are you lovely people today?